A moment of reflection: "Learn how to admire someone else's beauty without questioning your own." - Unknown.
(Photo Credit: @MicahGianneli.) Have you been following the recent Jordyn Woods vs. Khloe Kardashian scandal? If so I recommend you watch Jordyn Woods' latest interview on The Red Table Talk with @JadaPinkettSmith.
The Plus (+) Minus (-) Game of Beauty
"Admire someone else's beauty without questioning your own." - Unknown.
How many women have been in this position before? Where the man they 'loved' validated another woman's beauty, which concurrently made you, feel devalued of your own. Maybe it was your ex; he or she had an affair with a person who was your opposite. If you are a brunette, they went for a blonde, if you were short, they were tall, if your career wasn't put together, and theirs was. How did this make you feel? How tempting and satisfying was it to keep score? But more importantly how detrimental was this to your confidence and self-esteem?
Why Keeping Score Can Only Yield Losers
As my friends at Tiny Buddha put it, "the reality is everyone has a different scoring system" when it comes to beauty and relationships. "While you might like dark chocolate, their preference might be milk chocolate." While one person might prefer an 'Instagram model', someone else might be looking for the 'natural girl'. (@Jiabia when you read this you can insert my #HippieBullshit tag here). The truth is this kind of thinking is not only absurd, it's toxic and detrimental to your well-being.
Let Your Confidence Be The Most Attractive Quality About You
"I've never been the most beautiful girl in the room, but when I exude true confidence, it's like I am magnetic!" - Carolyn Mayville
For all you single girls out there wondering how to attract the right people into your life and to the women that are 'holding it down' in their current relationships, my advice is this: Develop true confidence! True confidence comes from knowing who you are. @Tarajiphenson said in her recent interview "If you know who you are...no one can use it against you."
If you haven't set a resolution for 2019 or you've got room for one more, here is my challenge to you: If you find yourself viewing other women as the competition, ask yourself what qualities they posses that you wish your had yourself. Then ask yourself, what you can do to obtain these desirable traits? Remember though, it's not about competing or validation but rather, finding satisfaction within yourself.
Do you need to hit the gym? Do you need to improve your current education level? Do you need to devote more time to your self-care routine? Whatever is in your control - pursue it. But if it requires compromising your integrity or health then be wise enough to recognize your own boundaries.
Have a Friend That Needs To Hear This Message? Please Continue To Elevate The Conversation & Share. Thank you.